It was clearly the best thing that had happened to me. I
remember the first time I met him, I felt nothing! This was obviously not going
to work. But it did. He meant so much to me. And like all girls I had dreams of
living in a distant land and living happily ever after. I wanted to work like
crazy and be the best at everything I do. I am good at what I do, but it is not
what I had planned and that makes me sad sometimes.
I still wonder what he must be like. What his work is like.
I stalk him on Facebook but I am not on his friend list, so I can’t really
know. He is married and I am glad. Even though I cried the day he got married,
I am glad. It was my decision to leave him. He doesn’t know anything. How could
I do this to him? Living with me is a battle and I just wouldn’t be happy if I
made other people suffer.
That evening changed everything. It was a normal day and I
was walking home from college, when Anirudh suddenly pulled me back and threw
that acid on my face. It took three operations and lot of donation just to get
my sight back.
I have my parents and
a lot of good people around me. I am happy. But I still wonder what if I had
given him a chance. I never thought I would think of this. I never thought I
would still want him. But I am the same person. The same person he knew so
well. Still knows so well. I am okay most of the time. I have books and they
are my favorite pastime. But I connect
him to every character I read, every song I hear. I wonder what it would be
like to be with him, like old times.
I still have the books he gave me. I read them often. And I
miss him. And it makes me sad that I don’t get to live with him on a distant
land. I missed my chance. But I also worry about what would have happened if he
didn’t want me anymore. That would be worse than this, to know that whom you
loved did not really love you for what you were.
am strong and independent, but I am human. I wish I could just know if he would
accept me, even if I don’t get to be with him. Maybe someday I’ll know what I
did was right or wrong, but my story will still be incomplete.